Just Saying

A friend invited me to go see MJ the Musical yesterday evening.  I didn’t know much about the show but decided to go.  Show turned out to be wonderful!!!  It was a reminder of old Jackson 5 songs, like “ABC” and “I Want You Back”, a lot of Michael’s personal hits like “Human Nature” and “She’s Out of My Life”, as well as some other popular songs.  The musical follows Jackson’s life up to his 1992 Dangerous Tour, mainly as a performer and hints at (but doesn’t dive into) some of the issues that came up during his life as “The King of Pop”.  I remember loving his music but becoming distracted by all the stories and allegations that came up against him.  I found myself not paying attention to his music as much and instead focusing on the negative press.  I realized last night that I miss his music and how some of his songs touched my life.  I know that we will never know the absolute truth behind all the “mysteries” of Michael Jackson this side of heaven, and we don’t need or have to.  Not knowing doesn’t affect our lives in any way and shouldn’t stop us from enjoying the music he left behind.  I can’t wait to listen to “Thriller” for Halloween tomorrow!!!

When I used to ask my dad how he was feeling, he usually told me he was “pushing”.  He also encouraged me to “push” when I would call him about something difficult or a current struggle.  “Just keep pushing” he’d say.  I believe his meaning was to keep getting back up and not give up/give in.  Now when I feel I’ve been knocked down or suffer a blow, I hear his voice and I “push”.   Difference is that not only am I continuing to get back up and fight, I’m also Praying Until Something Happens – P.U.S.H.

It’s rough out here!   Keep PUSHing!!!!

A simple saying that my mom has said over the years.  Simply put it means that she wants to be celebrated while she is still on this side of the dirt and can celebrate with us.  It’s true!   Why do we put off doing things with people?  Then when they’ve passed on, we bring flowers, cry, and wish we had more time to do the things we wanted to with them.

Taking this into consideration, I’ve taken two trips in the past month to celebrate some people.  First up was Panama City Beach in late September.  This was to attend a surprise 50^th wedding anniversary party for a good friend of mine.  Although the surprise had been ruined by some well-meaning friends that couldn’t attend, my friend and her husband were overwhelmed by all the people that did show up.  It was moving to see the husband tear up seeing his family that had traveled from TX for the occasion.  My friend told me she was surprised by the amount of people that showed up for them.  I told her that they had made a great impression on lots of people’s lives, so people showed up for them.

Second trip was an extended weekend in Charleston, SC during the first week of October.  I met up with my cousins to celebrate one cousin’s husband’s 70^th birthday.  It was a surprise trip, and he didn’t discover until arriving at the hotel just how many people (14) had traveled to mark this occasion with him.  At his special dinner, he thanked us for taking the time to be there for him.  Once again, I thought about the impact that he has had on my life and the lives of so many others.

My point is that I didn’t have to go on either trip, but I would have missed out on so much by not going.  The last time I saw some of my cousins was at my dad’s funeral.  By going, I created good memories by hanging out, laughing, and enjoying their company for a while.   Yes, I’m going to continue to give out some flowers now, while I still can.  Who knows?  I might even receive some.

Recently the subject of things we have to pay for has come up several times in my circle of friends.  It seems that as time passes, more and more things that were free have become things we have to pay for.  Remember when water was free?  Now the average cost of a bottle of water ranges from one to four dollars.  It seems new television streaming services pop up daily and I still remember when tv was free.  We’re paying thirty-five extra dollars on top of flight fares for the privilege of sitting in the exit row.  Airline ticket prices used to include any seat selection except for first class.   What about picking up your concert or theatre tickets at the venue?  Now, especially since the pandemic, tickets are purchased online (or through an app) and you’re charged a convenience and an administrative charge although it was not convenient for you at all!!!

As our lives continue to get busier, we are allowing conveniences to become necessities.  When we do this, we are pushing the line further and further back for what we’ll pay for.  Seems to me, the more we go along with the program, the more we will be charged for simple things.  You may feel it doesn’t seem like such a big deal now.  What happens when you have to pay to enter a public restroom or have to pay for toilet paper in that restroom?  Perspective changes – just something to think about.

Each day is a gift.  We say it, but do we realize just how true it really is? 

I was reminded recently that we are supposed to live in the present.  That means today.  We’re not supposed to be consumed with worries about tomorrow, or upset about things from the past.  We are to enjoy right now!!!  That’s not to say we don’t ever think about these things, but we’re not to let them take over our thoughts and distract us from what’s happening right now.  Live each day fully.  Do and see all the things.  Jesus said in Matthew 6:34, “…do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself.”

Again I say each day is a gift.  Enjoy the gift of the present!

Recently, I’ve been feeling reflective and a little bit melancholy.  I’ve been moving through the days and nights a bit slower than before. A co-worker mentioned that soon we would be turning the clocks back, and it CLICKED!!!  My nemesis has returned and is again trying it’s best to take me out.  SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) is back!!!

SAD has plagued me for years.  I suffer from the most common version which saps your energy and leaves you more depressed and moody during fall and winter months.  I’ve noticed it has intensified as I’ve gotten older, especially after my divorce.  Daylight is my energy source; kind of like that 1960’s cartoon superhero Birdman.  As soon as nightfall approaches, I want to get on my bed (or sofa) and curl up in a cozy blanket.  If I don’t push myself, I can become a hermit during these seasons.  I start canceling plans with friends to veg out in front of the tv or with a good book.

The time to start making a plan to fight this is now!  I start my day off with scripture and prayer.  I’ve increased my water intake and trying to exercise to be well hydrated and keep my endorphins high.  I’m also planning trips that can’t be canceled to get me out of the house.  I’ve told people in my yoga community to question me if I start dropping out of classes too often.  Time alone can be used to enjoy some hobbies that have been overlooked: crochet, working on jigsaw puzzles, and sewing.  Being creative usually brings me a lot of joy.  Having these things in place should keep me going to the Winter Solstice when we will start gaining more daylight, because March is a long way off!

Today commemorates 22 years since the horrible al-Qaeda attacks were made against the United States.  I remember, I had just come back from a wonderful trip to Playa del Carmen, Mexico.  When the first plane hit the World Trade Center, I was at work and we thought it was a terrible accident.  When the second plane hit, we knew it was much more.  There was sheer chaos at work.  Everyone was running around discussing and watching on their computers.  I, on the other hand, was on the phone trying to find out about my family members.  At the time, I had a lot of family that worked in the city and those that had worked in the World Trade Center had retired and were (Thank God) safely at home.  It was several hours before I knew the whereabouts of everyone, and that they were all safe.

September 11, 2001 was a terrible and dark day.  Watching New Yorkers pitch in and help one another during the days and weeks that followed was something that made me feel so proud.  As a transplanted “Yankee” in the South, I hear so many negative comments about New Yorkers being rude, always being in a hurry and looking out for number one.  It was great to see my fellow Northerners come together and present a united front to the world.  That’s what I choose to remember about this day.  Especially now when the United States don’t seem very united at all, I remember the Patriotism that came from such a vile act.  Good will always have victory over evil!

This day, the first Monday in September, is a holiday.  As such, I usually enjoy relaxing with friends and/or family or enjoying a day of television watching by myself.  It’s normally a day of catching up on shows on the dvr.   That was the plan this year.  Instead, I found myself leisurely cleaning, relaxing and reading throughout the three-day weekend.  The one exception was the movie I watched with my mom Saturday night.

As I scrubbed, caulked, painted, dusted, vacuumed and mopped, I listened to podcasts that I was behind on.  I ate meals while reading a book.  I took a break from the computer, most phone calls, emails and social media.  I was able to sort out some things that have been hanging around in my mind. It was a good holiday weekend.  It was different, but I believe I could do this again.  I feel accomplished and relaxed.  Perfect way to say goodbye to Summer and prepare for Fall!

In January 2022, I started having coughing/choking episodes and thought it was because of the dust from the renovations at my job.  Then, I started having them at home and on the weekend.  Due to Covid, I couldn’t get an appointment with an in-person doctor.  Through a telemedicine appointment, I was prescribed an inhaler.  I used it once and the reaction I had after using it ensured that I would not be using it again.

Fast forward to April 2022, I was still having these issues and the “attacks” were getting worse.  I’d smell perfume or cologne and immediately get to coughing and choking.  WHAT???  How can I live in the world and have issues with all these scents?   Finally, I was referred to an ENT and found out I have acid reflux.  It was (and still is honestly) difficult to understand how a scent is causing me to react in such a violent manner when previously I would just sneeze.  It’s all connected, and this is how my body is currently deciding to deal with it.   Although I don’t have the traditional symptoms of reflux, I was scoped, and it truly is reflux. 

I refused to take the PPI’s (Proton pump inhibitors) and antacids that were prescribed.  These medicines treat the symptoms but also have so many negative side effects.  Side effects include kidney problems, nausea, diarrhea and more.  PPI’s decrease acid production in the stomach for 12 hours.  When I mentioned to the doctor that I needed acid in my stomach to help digest food, he just looked at me.  Also, I don’t want to cure this acid reflux and end up with another list of symptoms from the meds that were supposed to help.  It’s a possible carousel ride, going around and around and around, and not a fun one either.

I’ve been on a journey to fix this naturally.  I’ve tried different things and have had some success.  The attacks are not as severe and can mostly be controlled.  I am currently trying another protocol consisting of some essential oils, as well as trying to lose weight.  The point is, I need to have a say in managing my health.  I refuse to just blindly take medicines that help line the pockets of the doctor’s and pharmaceutical companies and can potentially cause more issues for myself.  At the end of the day, I must live with the consequences.

This year is flying by.  Hard to believe, in two weeks, we’ll be enjoying Labor Day weekend!  After that Halloween is up next.  For some reason, after Halloween everything is a blur and soon it’s January 1.

Take time to enjoy the last “lazy” days of Summer.  Do the fun things you’ve meant to do this year.  My summer goal was to read one shelf of books from one of my carts of books.  Don’t ask why I have so many books because that’s a story for another time.  Anyhow, I love reading and I have been working through the shelf and have three books left.  Since I grew up in NY, Summer is June, July and August.  I consider Labor Day weekend the end.  I might not make the deadline, but I’ve accomplished more reading this summer than in the past and I will make sure I finish the shelf before the end of September.

The point is that life is short, and time goes by very quickly.  Make sure that you’re not just doing things you have to do and not having any enjoyment in life.  Enjoy your family and friends while you can.  Do the things you’ve been wanting to do.  Covid reminded us just how precious life is, and how quickly it changes.  If you learned nothing else from it, I hope you learned to appreciate every day God allows you to open your eyes.  That is truly a gift.